Life Confessions | On Real Life and Blogging

» 17 October, 2015 » Life » 7 comments



I call it REAL LIFE like blogging isn’t apart of that. That’s not what I mean – because OBVIOUSLY blogging is apart of our life.

But how much of the people in your personal life – friends, family, co workers etc. know you blog? How many REALLY understand and know what it takes to build, create and maintain your blog? How many read it?

“What happens when your “blog life” crosses over with your “real life?”

There are not many people in my family that know I blog. My husband, obviously. Who is my biggest cheerleader. My kids, my mom and my niece. I don’t have many “outside of blogging” friends – so, none of them know I blog. There are a few co-workers that know I RUN a blog, and one of them even subscribed; whether or not she reads anything is anyone’s guess. But that’s about it.

Truth is – I feed WEIRD talking about my blog to non-avid readers, even avid readers. Not because I am ashamed of it OR this community. Not because I would think it’d be HILARIOUS for them to see the types of books I read on this blog OR discussions that I have – because let’s face it, I read some dirty books and talk about sex like it’s no big thang. Which it isn’t.. But because I feel like I am giving those people who KNOW ME IN REAL LIFE an inside look into my mind and how it ticks, and it’s just.. an unsettling feeling. Because most don’t really KNOW ME, ya know?

I had a co-worker look at my blog and then come to me the next day and say, “Hey I checked out your blog. It’s interesting!” And I thought, “OMG! What blog did he read? PLEASE TELL ME he didn’t see ANY posts about sex! What was the last thing I posted?” Because that wouldn’t have been weird or anything. Hilarious, but weird all the same.

Yet at the same time – I am proud of what I have done with my blog – both of them. I am NOT ashamed of what I do or say on EITHER blog. I have put a lot of hard work and time into this hobby and I have loved every minute of it. So I ask myself:

why don’t I want them to read it?

On the flip side – there are 5 bloggers that I consider close friends – 3 of those my best friends. They know A LOT about my personal life and we talk almost everyday. And books aren’t usually a topic of discussion 8/10 times. I love them and I am so HAPPY that they are in my life. And funny thing is – we don’t interact on each other’s blog often. I read it of course, because I always want to know what they have to say – but it’s different now. Not to say that I don’t want them reading my blog because now we are IRL friends (that just SOUNDS juvenile.) My point is – my blogging life crossed with my personal life and there is NOTHING weird about it. What’s the difference?


On a less personal note – explaining what a “book/review” blog is, is not easy. “So, you talk about books?” Well, yes. But it’s so much more than that and explaining it is hard!

I had one co-worker want details because she thinks her niece would LOVE to start a blog. We talked a little bit about it – how it works, contacts I have, etc. and she says, “Oh awesome, you never have to buy books! My niece would love that!”


So you see, it isn’t just the personal aspect that makes me hesitant to talk about my blog. It’s explaining what it IS, how much work it REALLY takes. It’s explaining that it’s not just TALKING ABOUT BOOKS or getting free books. It’s a hobby, sure. But it’s a passion. One that a lot of people don’t understand.


I turn the spotlight on you

  • How do you feel about your friends, family and co workers reading your blog? 
  • Do you talk about personal stuff on your blog?
  • Is there anything you WOULDN’T want someone in your “real life” to see that’s on your blog?



Tonya is a 30 y/o mom, wife, avid reader, coffee junkie, junk food addicted workaholic and blogger.

7 responses to “Life Confessions | On Real Life and Blogging

  1. Red Iza

    I cheat, I’m French and my blog is in English, so few of my relatives can actually read it. I definitely wouldn’t want my mother, sister and daughters to read it – for the sex part, it would be awkward… My boyfriend knows, reads English and sometimes looks at the screen when I blog, but he’s not that interested (girls books, you know). The only person I wouldn’t mind reading it (because she reads the same books) is my coworker, but her English is not good enough. I translate my reviews for her 🙂

  2. Celine

    I always feel so weird talking about my blog in real life! Especially because I don’t want to brag about getting free books, but review copies and ARCs are actually a big part of what I do with my blog. I don’t mind them reading my blog, but it does feel oddly personal when they do. Like they’re seeing a side of me that I don’t show in my day to day life? I don’t know. Great post!

  3. Heather

    I don’t want people I know reading my blog. I feel like I would censor myself too much if I knew they were going to be reading.

  4. Michelle @ Book Briefs

    This is a great post. I am hesitant to tell a lot of my high school and college friends about my blog. My family and coworkers know and a few of my law school friends, but I keep it separate past that. And to my knowledge out of all the people that know, only my grandmother kind of reads it. She skims the post titles basically. And that makes me uncomfortable because of the nature of some of the books. We are kind of in a “don’t ask don’t tell” mode as far as that goes, and she has never made anything uncomfortable. But I still don’t feel comfortable posting about it on my personal facebook, and the decision to make my instagram a place I also show pictures of my books was a tough one for me. I figure I will get a few thats weird comments but I decided I am ok with that.

    as to your other point, I completely agree. Unless someone actually runs a blog, I don’t think they have any idea just how much work it is. They think it is all about perks, but I don’t think they understand the time, and effort that goes into reading, reviewing and keeping your blog current. I try and post every day, which takes up a ton of time. On top of my job, and on top of my “real life” commitments like visiting my family and friends, traveling for work, etc. Whenever I go out of town, I need to prep my blog, it doesn’t just keep going without me and I don’t think people even in my family and “real life” understand that.

    wow, I just went really off course with a rant of my own. Sorry about that, but your post inspired me to think about just how frustrating it is when people don’t understand that my blog is like another job to me (one where I don’t get paid)

  5. Laura

    I always feel kind of weird about people I know in real life reading my blog too, particularly people from work (who somehow found out about it!). When I first started blogging I didn’t really tell anyone until a couple of months in, and then it was only really my Mum. Now my grandparents read it too (which is why I’m definitely careful what I’m writing on there!), and my boyfriend, and my sister is subscribed (although to be fair she never checks her emails so I doubt she actually reads any of my posts!).
    It really is so hard to get across to non-bloggers what blogging is really all about though. People seem to think it’s a hobby that takes up, like an hour a week or something and don’t seem to realise that there’s more to it than just writing something and pressing publish.
    Great post!

  6. Nicole @ Feed Your Fiction Addiction

    I don’t talk much about my blog with people “in real life.” There are some who know about it, but I don’t know that anyone actually reads it (except my mom). I agree that it’s kind of a weird transition from blog to real life. I wish I had really close blogging friends like you do – I’m glad you’ve found those types of relationships through blogging!!

    Nicole @ Feed Your Fiction Addiction

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